Nanrod

Recently, baby, you've been on my mind. All the time.

One week, six days.

Meaning I’m not back until midday of the 19th. So for Dave/Parky planning birthday related shenanigans… a time leaning more towards that day would be mint. Otherwise I’ll just raid you that evening. Pleasantly raid, of course. I’m not sure what I think of this “late to get here, late to get back” philosophy Bath seem to be employing.

Only just out of the shower. I stayed in my bed until six and I’m finding out how fifteen hour sleeps waste a lot of your day for some reason.

Now for my Analysis problem sheet. Make sure you’ve set epsilon as an arbitrarily small real number greater than zero, everyone! =D

No.

• December 06, 2009, 6:35pm

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Dear Jason Derulo

Your song, Whatcha Say, has been out for quite some time now and I thought I would write this helpful blog post with regards to your efforts.

What the fuck are you doing?

The song starts and what’s this? The radio is playing Imogen Heap? I love this song. Truly this is a delight. What, hang on, did the track just skip?

I am then treated to a sample of autotune’s finest. This in itself is not necessarily a bad thing - God knows I’ll give Kanye mad props at any given opportunity - but you, sir, are not half as cool as he. Not even a tenth. [Insert obligatory “I’ma let you finish” reference]

Your lyrics are clichéd. You cheated on your baby girl with some hoe, got found out, and now you’re sorry and will buy her lots of nice things to make up because you’re gonna make it real big and be a star. You sound like a douchebag.

A song hasn’t made me this angry since Riverside became the new I Gotta Feeling.

I hate Riverside.

• December 04, 2009, 11:44pm

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Never Again

I was out at the “superclub” Oceana last night. I didn’t know until about three hours before I had to leave, but a spare ticket was floating about so James offered it to me. What a guy.

I had a really good night.

First we went to Pitcher and Piano, and there I met Colan. Not because of some great celestial coincidence. But because I told him to go there. Then we spent a good while just catching up with what’s been going on and talking about the impending journey back home for Christmas. After which we went to the club and danced to some epically cheese music. C’est la Vie (of B*Witched fame) was played. I knew all the words. I also did a faux Irish jig during the tin whistle solo.

Eventually Colan headed back home to read a book. At 1.30am. Good book reading times, like. But the coach home didn’t leave for another hour.

I wish it had left sooner.

Not long after Colan left, a couple of guys came up and started trying to dance with the girls in our group. Now our girls were obviously not keen on the whole situation so I whipped out my usual “chase them off by ironically dancing them” technique. The other guy then grabbed me and furiously grinded me. The original guy then threw me off him and started to snog him. Hard. I ran away…

Good God. I don’t think I’ll ever feel safe doing that again.

Oceana also sells hot dogs. All clubs should learn to emulate this.

• December 01, 2009, 2:44pm

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I Miss

Potato Bread
“Dead on”
Belfast
Working in the freezer
Driving
Maths making sense
Chelsea Dagger
“Did you hear Hunter shat on Ananda’s bed?”
The Antiques Roadshow
You
Iceland banter
Compiling “lists” in the common room
The inevitable fallout from aforementioned lists
Making a shaking motion by my penis while having one hand raised aloft
Mr. Doey
Paddy Kelly’s
Ciara
Formal excitement
Down High
Lunch in Maud’s
Killough Pub Quiz
Epic shit
Taping Parky to a chair
Guy talk

It doesn’t matter that I have so many people I love here. There is a sea between me and the previous fourteen years of my life. In three weeks I’ll be home again. Half of me can’t wait, and half of me is shit scared everything will have changed.

• November 29, 2009, 6:15pm

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